The UN defines youth as the period in your life between the ages of 15 and 24. Kind of a depressing thing to hear when you’re less two months away from your 25th birthday.
Realizing that I am now an adult by all definitions and free to do whatever my heart desires is something I desperately yearned for at 18, but actually somewhat daunts me at 25. One thought repeats itself in my mind: have I done enough with my life?
Apparently, this question is the hallmark of what psychologists call a Quarter-Life Crisis. Unfortunately, unlike those going through a mid-life crisis, I cannot afford a red sports car with a V12 engine loud enough to drown out my own thoughts.
The phenomenon is one that is proliferating among young adults who start to feel like maybe they are not so young anymore. Highly educated, successful men and women find themselves staring blankly at their lives and wondering if they did everything they possibly could have done in 25 years. Were they far enough along in their career, were they happy working for “the man”, and why hadn’t they met the one yet are all questions that race through their minds as they realize that their existence has already spanned a quarter of a century.
After graduating from university most of us believe we are going to change the world. The truth is, the world spins by so fast (without our help, I might add) that we find ourselves 5 years post grad wondering whether we have even left our fingerprints on the windowpane of our existence. And it doesn’t seem to matter where you are in your life at that point, as the epitome of a quarter life crisis is best defined by the old cliché “the grass is always greener on the other side.” Successful managers find themselves attending their peers’ weddings and wondering why their own love life hasn’t fallen together, while happily married individuals begin to question whether they gave up their singledom too quickly.
No one is satisfied.
The problem with the twenties is that we have recently left behind a period of our lives marked by rites of passage and milestones to hit. Life is set out by a series of gates and graduations, which make it easy to assess whether we’re on the right path. As soon as the last degree is attained, though, it’s all free falling from there. Post-grad, society’s definition of success ranges over such a wide spectrum that we struggle to pinpoint exactly where we want to be and where we want to go.
Right now, my own compass is going haywire.
Now, I tend to be over-analytical and may be wrongly speaking on behalf of my generation, but do ask yourself one question before you dismiss the Quarter-Life Crisis: do you feel that you should have done more with your life or should have everything a little bit more figured out by now?
If you answered yes, I sadly cannot offer advice but I can offer you a bit of comfort in telling you that you are not alone.
